How would I describe my University experience? I think
perhaps the best word would be confusing.
One of my favourite quotes of all time, from the master of
quotable sayings - the mysterious ‘anon,’ is “every day takes finding out how
to live all over again.” I think that best summarises both my personal
experiences and academic ones.
When arriving to the first module Historical methods and
sources, I was probably as sure as many historians were in the objective,
established and demonstrable facts of history. I knew what history was for sure,
I simply wanted to get right into what happened. As time wore on throughout
this module my reading slowly opened up to me, beyond the wars, politics and
great men of traditional history, the vast realm of what people have decided to
write about and the method in which they write about it. I was confused,
overwhelmed. I no longer thought I knew what History really was.
Things came to a head with a discussion in the final week –
the challenge of postmodernism. The more I read on the subject the more I was
certain this ‘school of history’ couldn’t function on its own. The nature of
postmodernism’s approach to facts prompted one (in)famous commenter of our
cohort to exclaim “I think their brains fell out.”
On the road to understanding, I now find that a lack of
confusion is actually a warning sign. Getting towards the truth should be
difficult, it should be confusing. I am always mindful of the old saying “a
good lie is easier to believe than the truth.” Replace the word lie with
argument and you may have summed up a lot of History.
To become too concretely grounded in something is often
dangerous. You should challenge your own ideas. To avoid the challenge to your
beliefs is to betray the fear you hold of deconstructing them; a fear of
letting go of the world you have constructed around you. As Nietzsche said
“convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.”
The process of history is constantly moving, it is a
constant desire to understand that does not stop when the conclusion is
written, or published, but continues on as discussion. I have grappled with
history constantly since the start of my degree, and every time I feel close
tightening my grip on something concrete it slips through my fingers. Embrace
the fluid nature of knowledge.
“Every day takes finding out how to live all over again.”
Written by K. Buchanan, 2012
It's scary how much I agree with this. Really.
ReplyDeleteAll preconceptions must be challenged. I can cite an example of where this paid off for me, very recently:
I got about 2/3 of the way through 'Birdsong'. The first 100 pages were alright, but the remainder just didn't do anything for me. In its portrayal of World War I it just rehashed the same old myths that have polluted our national psyche for the last 50 or 60 years. So I put the book down.
Then I picked up 'A Moveable Feast' by Hemingway. Got about 50 pages in and was bored rigid. So I put that one down too.
Then I thought 'How about something completely different? Something that gets me out of my comfort zone?'
So I started reading trainspotting. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say it's shifted my whole outlook. I now view members of the 'underclass' as real people, instead of an anonymous, threatening mass of 'chavs'. I see how 'middle class' tastes, values and preconceptions dominate popular culture- to the detriment of anyone who doesn't belong to that class. I see how Standard English has completely conquered the intellectual sphere, at the expense of dialect (Trainspotting is written in 'Scots'- a sister language of English).
Particularly powerful though (and relevant to your post) is this sentence from the book, spoken by the main character Mark Renton:
'We develop aw they long-winded ideas which jist interpret the reality ay oor lives in different weys, withoot really extending oor body ay worthwhile knowledge, about the big things, the real things.'
I interpret this to mean- 'truth' is a subjective business. The things we call 'truths' actually have no value or relevance outside our own minds, our own lives.
So perhaps we have to settle merely for questions. But they're certainly lots more fun than answers.
-Phil Booth